Kids these Days

Marie Miller said:
Ken, a lot of them get treated like secondary life forms. Had I known back then what I learned over time - life would have been easier and compensation better. If you want personal anecdotes just say so.
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So if somebody breaks into your home you welcome them? How many have you invited into your home Marie?
What part of illegal do people do not understand, American can't take in the whole third world.
 
Yvonne Smith said:
“When I misbehaved as a child, my most dreaded punishment was having my dad give me a "talking to." Somehow I could not stand knowing that I had disappointed my father and it made me feel so bad that a spanking could not have made me feel any worse.”


This is exactly how it was with me growing up, too !
I loved my mom and dad dearly, and could never have had any better parents. When I was too little to understand the lectures, my mom had a little “balloon stick” which she used sparingly if absolutely necessary. Plus, I am sure I got the lecture anyway, even if i was too little for it to do much good.

As I grew older, I could count on a 20 minute lecture from my mom, if needed (and probably even if not needed), but I tried hard to do everything they expected of me, because I never wanted to hurt my parents or disappoint them.
I never remember my dad spanking me, or even raising his voice to me. A disappointed look was enough to break my heart, because my sun rose and set on my Daddy.

Pretty much this is how it was when I was raising my kids, although I was not as good a parent as my mom and dad were. But any kind of spanking was rare, and usually we just discussed things, or removed privileges if necessary.
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So everyone is supposed to raise their kids by your parents standards? And you disagree with scripture?

Yvonne it is either one way or the other, either it is ok at times or not ok at anytime.
Do not withhold discipline from the child; If you swat him with a reed-like rod [applied with godly wisdom], he will not die.

Christian Standard Bible
 
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Yvonne Smith said:
As I grew older, I could count on a 20 minute lecture from my mom, if needed (and probably even if not needed), but I tried hard to do everything they expected of me, because I never wanted to hurt my parents or disappoint them.
I never remember my dad spanking me, or even raising his voice to me. A disappointed look was enough to break my heart, because my sun rose and set on my Daddy.
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This was me, exactly. I adored my father. When I was a kid, I wrote him a note telling him if I could choose any daddy in the world, I'd choose him. When he died, I found that folded note tucked into his wallet so he had carried it for decades.

My mother had this "go cut me a switch" thing, but somehow she never used the switch. She'd just wave it around, lol.
 
Marie Mallory said:
Beth you sure did a lot of disagreeing after you stated to agree,;)
I don't know why these debates turn into arguments, but i just take time off when it gets argumentive.

Now first off a Christian would have to talk to the Creator about this corporal punishment thing.
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I'm not arguing with you, Marie. I'm telling you how I was raised and how I raised my children. I made some mistakes but I did the best I could.

If you have read my posts in the past, you will know that I do not profess to be a Christian, and I do not hang my hat on what is written in the Bible. I respect people who do, but for me it is a non-issue. The Bible is open to interpretation; there is plenty written there that is not to be taken literally.
 
Oh man! When I was very young and misbehaved, I got spankings, a good talking too, and had extra work to do around the house or yard. My dad was mainly the disciplinarian. My sweet mom was a push over, but not all the time.:oops: Sometimes my Dad could give us “the look” and that would be enough to make us behave.

When I had gotten to be a teenager, I got grounded, couldn’t talk to my friends, and they gave me extra chores to do, as if I didn’t already have enough. I don’t know why my parents disciplined me all the time because I was such darling little angel; sweet obedient child I was. 😇😅 My cousins and some of my friends had the same type of up-bringing. My parents were not terrible nor abusive people by any means, but they were very strict.
 
Krystal Shay said:
Oh man! When I was very young and misbehaved, I got spankings, a good talking too, and had extra work to do around the house or yard. My dad was mainly the disciplinarian. My sweet mom was a push over, but not all the time.:oops: Sometimes my Dad could give us “the look” and that would be enough to make us behave.

When I had gotten to be a teenager, I got grounded, couldn’t talk to my friends, and they gave me extra chores to do, as if I didn’t already have enough. I don’t know why my parents disciplined me all the time because I was such darling little angel; sweet obedient child I was. 😇😅 My cousins and some of my friends had the same type of up-bringing. My parents were not terrible nor abusive people by any means, but they were very strict.
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I was just thinking that birth order probably played a part in how I was disciplined. I am the baby of my family and according to my siblings I got away with murder, haha.

I had "the look" for our kids, too. If they were acting up in public I would bend down and whisper, "you don't want to go to the car with me" and that's all it took. :ROFLMAO: :ROFLMAO:
 
Marie Mallory said:
So everyone is supposed to raise their kids by your parents standards? And you disagree with scripture?

Yvonne it is either one way or the other, either it is ok at times or not ok at anytime.
Do not withhold discipline from the child; If you swat him with a reed-like rod [applied with godly wisdom], he will not die.

Christian Standard Bible
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I think that no one is trying to say how everyone should raise their children, @Marie Mallory . Each parent is different,each child is different. What is effective discipline with one child might have no effect at all with another child, even though they are siblings with the exact same parents.

As far as discipline; every child needs discipline, but that is a far cry from the brutality that some children grow up with.
Sadly, some Christian parents can be the worst disciplinarians, and don’t get the right mix of education/teaching and love happening with their efforts at being parents.

If a child is too young to understand reasoning, sometimes a swat on the behind is an appropriate method of teaching them not to do something that is dangerous to them.
Once they are old enough to listen to reason, then most physical punishment only creates resentment, in my opinion.
 
Yvonne Smith said:
I think that no one is trying to say how everyone should raise their children, @Marie Mallory . Each parent is different,each child is different. What is effective discipline with one child might have no effect at all with another child, even though they are siblings with the exact same parents.

As far as discipline; every child needs discipline, but that is a far cry from the brutality that some children grow up with.
Sadly, some Christian parents can be the worst disciplinarians, and don’t get the right mix of education/teaching and love happening with their efforts at being parents.

If a child is too young to understand reasoning, sometimes a swat on the behind is an appropriate method of teaching them not to do something that is dangerous to them.
Once they are old enough to listen to reason, then most physical punishment only creates resentment, in my opinion.
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Yvonne, my post wasn't about child abuse ,it was about child correction for most parents in my day. I don't rememebr any families or principle in a school that didn't use a paddle or a switch untill I was a teen. Which mama told the principle he best not put his paddle on my brother again, and he didn't.
My mother was the one who did corrections in our family, since our father left, no man was ever allowed to whip me or my brothers.
I do understand and hate to know that some kids are beaten and abused by sick evil parents, we never were. Switching leaves a few stripes but not scars or bleeds. Mama would not use her hands on us, just switches or a belt.
 
I am not opposed to corporal punishment, within reason, and if necessary, and I don't deny that the Bible supports striking children. However, a combination of good parenting and healthy children can make this unnecessary, and I don't see where the Bible says to beat your children whether they need it or not.

I grew up on a working farm, although my father did a lot of other work as well, yet neither my brothers nor I were ever struck by our parents as far as I am aware. Of course, I wouldn't know this from a personal perspective since I wouldn't have ever deserved it, me being me and all.
 
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Marie Mallory said:
Yvonne, my post wasn't about child abuse ,it was about child correction for most parents in my day. I don't rememebr any families or principle in a school that didn't use a paddle or a switch untill I was a teen. Which mama told the principle he best not put his paddle on my brother again, and he didn't.
My mother was the one who did corrections in our family, since our father left, no man was ever allowed to whip me or my brothers.
I do understand and hate to know that some kids are beaten and abused by sick evil parents, we never were. Switching leaves a few stripes but not scars or bleeds. Mama would not use her hands on us, just switches or a belt.
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You keep on using words like whip and paddle. L mama did not use her hands.
 
Marie Miller said:
The discussion did not end but getting whipped by parents sounds like something out of the dark ages.
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I don’t think the word “whipped” sounds like the dark ages. I guess it depends on your definition of “whipped” and where you were raised. Words have different meanings to different people in different areas of the world. When I was growing up, a whipping, a spanking, and a swat on the butt was all used interchangeable. The result was going to be the same in the end. ;):D
 
Ken Anderson said:
I am not opposed to corporal punishment, within reason, and if necessary, and I don't deny that the Bible supports striking children. However, a combination of good parenting and healthy children can make this unnecessary, and I don't see where the Bible says to beat your children whether they need it or not.

I grew up on a working farm, although my father did a lot of other work as well, yet neither my brothers nor I were ever struck by our parents as far as I am aware. Of course, I wouldn't know this from a personal perspective since I wouldn't have ever deserved it, me being me and all.
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Ken you sure you worded this right?

"a combination of good parenting and healthy children can make this unnecessary, and I don't see where the Bible says to beat your children whether they need it or not."
I think my mother was a good parent although she would use a switch now and then, Bible doesn't say beat the child for no reason.
 
Marie Mallory said:
So if somebody breaks into your home you welcome them? How many have you invited into your home Marie?
What part of illegal do people do not understand, American can't take in the whole third world.
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Marie, this has nothing to do with what I said to Ken.
If you do a bit of research on legal and illegal immigration numbers you will probably find that 3rd world countries are not the only ones. Of course it also depends on your personal interpretation of what nations are 3rd world.
 
Krystal Shay said:
I don’t think the word “whipped” sounds like the dark ages. I guess it depends on your definition of “whipped” and where you were raised. Words have different meanings to different people in different areas of the world. When I was growing up, a whipping, a spanking, and a swat on the butt was all used interchangeable. The result was going to be the same in the end. ;):D
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Hitting a child with a switch is not parenting.
 
Marie Miller said:
Marie, this has nothing to do with what I said to Ken.
If you do a bit of research on legal and illegal immigration numbers you will probably find that 3rd world countries are not the only ones. Of course it also depends on your personal interpretation of what nations are 3rd world.
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Marie I'm not sure either, maybe I didn't understand what you were sayin?
 
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