Is This How You Imagined Your "Golden Years?" How is Life Treating You?

Beth Gallagher

Beth Gallagher

Well-known member
It occurred to me recently that I am living the life I always pictured as an old retired person. I have a comfortable home and everything I need, and most importantly I can still do as I please.

It's nice to take a nap if I want to, or just sit outside in the sun with a good book. I still have my wits about me (for the most part) and the physical ability to go and do without imposing on anyone. My life seems to have gone pretty well in spite of me and some questionable choices I have made. My husband and I still like to be with each other; no harshness or criticism from him, ever. He's my best friend and has always let me be me.

Our children are all self-sufficient and seem to be happy. I hope they are. I made mistakes as a mother but the kids seem to have turned out pretty well. They keep in close touch with us and with each other though we all live far apart.

So I'm grateful. Grateful for my life and for my family, and for friends and creature comforts. I know that my life is winding down and my body is slowly failing me, but somehow life isn't so bad.

Is your life now as you expected it would be?
 
Beth Gallagher said:
It occurred to me recently that I am living the life I always pictured as an old retired person. I have a comfortable home and everything I need, and most importantly I can still do as I please.

It's nice to take a nap if I want to, or just sit outside in the sun with a good book. I still have my wits about me (for the most part) and the physical ability to go and do without imposing on anyone. My life seems to have gone pretty well in spite of me and some questionable choices I have made. My husband and I still like to be with each other; no harshness or criticism from him, ever. He's my best friend and has always let me be me.

Our children are all self-sufficient and seem to be happy. I hope they are. I made mistakes as a mother but the kids seem to have turned out pretty well. They keep in close touch with us and with each other though we all live far apart.

So I'm grateful. Grateful for my life and for my family, and for friends and creature comforts. I know that my life is winding down and my body is slowly failing me, but somehow life isn't so bad.

Is your life now as you expected it would be?
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Good for you Beth, I kind of feel the same way now. Although I do get lonely since we left everyone and moved to Florida to be near the water and raise equine. Ranch didn't turn out but we do have a little forest for me to play in.
 
Marie Mallory said:
Good for you Beth, I kind of feel the same way now. Although I do get lonely since we left everyone and moved to Florida to be near the water and raise equine. Ranch didn't turn out but we do have a little forest for me to play in.
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That's the hard part about living so far from the children. They scattered all over the place so I feel that we missed a lot of "grandchildren time." I often think about what I might do if anything were to happen to my husband; I definitely wouldn't stay in this house by myself so which kid would I move closer to...?

Our oldest son lives in Oregon and has divorced from his nutty wife, so maybe I could wheedle him into returning to Houston. :D
 
Beth Gallagher said:
That's the hard part about living so far from the children. They scattered all over the place so I feel that we missed a lot of "grandchildren time." I often think about what I might do if anything were to happen to my husband; I definitely wouldn't stay in this house by myself so which kid would I move closer to...?

Our oldest son lives in Oregon and has divorced from his nutty wife, so maybe I could wheedle him into returning to Houston. :D
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All my grand kids are grown now but I did get to spend lots of time with them when they were young. some of the great grands I haven't even met, 5 live in Texas and 3 in Georgia.
 
For the most part yes, but I always wanted to travel more including the states I haven't seen and a few countries. Due to vestibular disorder, no flying, no boats, ships, or such, no trains. and no vehicles over a long distance with big elevation changes.

I suppose at age 25, when I was living in the mountains and I built my cabin and place to be my forever home, I expected to retire there and live happily till death at an old age. I accept the way things are now and know that my happiness depends on me. I know some day, I will go to semi assisted living, and while I didn't see that on my application for old age, I don't feel duped, because the fine print seems to be invisible to all youth.
 
In marriage, there are items that mark each anniversary such as gifts of tradition like cotton, iron, wool, steel, lace, gold, etc.
I’m not really sure but I think the last one is diamond.

Now, again, I’m not really sure but there has to be such things that mark our years on earth. I mean, we go right from cotton (diapers) to “Golden” years and perhaps the re-entry of diapers anew.

I mean, what is traditional for the halmarks like for toddlers or puberty or young adult? Or even for the occasional 2nd childhood or the third?
And further, if there is nothing in between birth and golden besides old fart, I guess I’m stuck on OF because my brain still hasn’t wrapped itself around what exactly the Golden years are except the excessive opportunity to nap and more time to think of better ways to procrastinate and get away with it.

Maybe I’m just thinking about it too hard.
I’m enjoying retirement. If the queen of the house lets me, I can do pretty much anything I want. The government sends me a check every month. I’m fit and going to get “fitter” and still thinking about getting down to brass tacks and competing in the Alabama Master’s bodybuilders in the natural (clean) catagory when I hit 80. Or maybe not.
I have very few calendar days or clock times when I have to do this or that so I’m pretty much free’er than I was just before I became an OF.

So yeah, I guess “the golden years” are good so far. They’re not quite what I expected but very few of my expectations have been what I thought they should be throughout my life so no tears here.
I don’t think I’ll be hanging around singing “Is That All There Is” (Peggy Lee) ) because I’m still looking forward to what tomorrow brings and enjoying leaving yesterday behind because I’m in my golden years and I can get away with it.

Edit: Hoot reminded me that it wasn’t Patty but rather Peggy Lee who sang “is that all there is” so I threw an edit in there. Oops!
 
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I'm still waiting for that comfortable-touch Tupperware "hose it out" house. Warm in Winter, cool in Summer. Nothing big.

But if I start thinking hard I might modify that, and focus more on some sort of community setting I prefer. Drivable with low traffic but still very walkable. No big yards, but room for neat vegetable patches, flower beds, a couple of fruit trees. An easy amble to a small commercial strip with a modest drugstore, lunch counter or "micro food court" offering a couple of food styles with seating along a picture window front maybe looking over a park. Maybe a Post Office.

I haven't thought it all out. For now I'm pretty happy where I am.
 
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I have been thinking about this question. In some ways, retirement is what I thought it would be and other ways, no. We thought we would be financially ok in retirement because we saved and planned for it, which we are fine financially, and that is a comfort.

But thinking about retirement many years ago, when at a young age, I guess I thought I would just transition into retirement with the same amount of energy, motivation, curiosity and desires that I have always had. I know that thinking was naïve. That’s called being young and dumb. But like Faye said, about retirement, “the fine print seems to be invisible to all youth”.

Now that I am retired, I am mostly tired and not motivated to do much of anything, except what needs to be done. Some days are just boring and lonely. However, I am fairly healthy (*knock*) with a nice roof over my head, with plenty of food to eat, and a little money in my pocket so I can’t complain about retirement. It is ok!! It would be much better if my husband would go fishing more though.🐟 :ROFLMAO:🤷‍♀️
 
Jacob Petersheim said:
I'm still waiting for that comfortable-touch Tupperware "hose it out" house. Warm in Winter, cool in Summer. Nothing big.

But if I start thinking hard I might modify that, and focus more on some sort of community setting I prefer. Drivable with low traffic but still very walkable. No big yards, but room for neat vegetable patches, flower beds, a couple of fruit trees. An easy able to a small commercial strip with a modest drugstore, lunch counter or "micro food court" offering a couple of food styles with seating along a picture window front maybe looking over a park. Maybe a Post Office.

I haven't thought it all out. For now I'm pretty happy where I am.
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Take a road trip through northern Alabama.
 
Krystal Shay said:
It is ok!! It would be much better if my husband would go fishing more though.🐟 :ROFLMAO:🤷‍♀️
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I got a chuckle out of this comment. I took early retirement and had a couple of years to myself before my husband decided to also retire early at 60. I love him dearly but dreaded the thought of him being home all day!!

I had visions of him bored and dogging my footsteps, but it's been a few years now and we're both survived the "togetherness," thanks to a 2-story house and his interests in volunteer work and helping the kids with projects. :ROFLMAO: I can't imagine life without him, as long as he is downstairs and I am upstairs!!
 
I didn't retire because I never had a career. I've been a bum my whole life, doing what I wanted in between taking care of family. I've had jobs but hubby was the main bread winner.
I still do what I want. My main focus is the farm although I may get the kids to help with it. There's a lot of different aspects to work on and my barnhouse is there if I want a nap.
It would be nice if I could get a new right leg at Walmart, though.
 
For someone who always considered herself a realist , I have had moments of unreal expectations for myself in aging.
I had ever intention of looking and acting and being that Wow older person But CHF, ESF ,and other things brought me to my knees. I will almost content with the fact that I have aged, and enjoy it -on a good day. I have become a recluse though, mainly because this area does not have the things I miss fr:(om Texas. I maybe older but do not want to sit around discussing all me aliments with others and other old people stuff. :)
Also as long as I have Mark I will continue on, he is my everything and his loss would be more than I could handle.
The good thing we have- is an uncanny sense of humor, and in old ages you must progress with humor . We laugh a lot and well we bicker too, but its all done with love and having been together for 36 years. ;)
 
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