Are You a Complainer?

[Bobby Cole]

Although one might understand his reasoning but Job complained a Lot which is one of the central themes in the book.

Now, through it all, perhaps his wife was tired of hearing it when she said, “Just curse God and die”.
* a rather harsh lesson on how to reject a complainer ?*

 

[Mary Stetler]

I asked AI about a complainer and explainer in a marriage?

AI REPLY:
"The dynamic between a "complainer" and an "explainer" (or a solution-oriented partner) is a common relationship pattern that often stems from different communication styles and unmet emotional needs. The key to managing this dynamic is shifting from a cycle of negativity to constructive communication."

The Dynamic Explained

• The Complainer (often seeking empathy): This partner typically voices grievances as a way to express feelings of being unheard, unappreciated, or stressed. They are often looking for validation and emotional support, not an immediate fix.
• The Explainer (often problem-solving): This partner's natural instinct is to offer solutions or "play devil's advocate" to resolve the issue quickly. They may feel frustrated or helpless if their solutions are dismissed, not realizing their partner primarily needs a listener.

This difference can lead to a cycle where the complainer feels dismissed and the explainer feels like their partner is "always wanting more" or being a "victim".

I am a Fixer. I explain. But of course, my way is always the right way and if you don't do that, I will complain.
I am pretty good at coming up with solutions, alternative and otherwise.

 

[Marie Mallory]

I explain my complaining

You mean he listens?

 

[Joe Riley]

In the year1955...when I wrote my last letter to Santa, I explained my mishaps and my falling off the red wagon a few times. I went on, and on, & on. Then I complained how he had missed the mark with that Red Ryder BB gun! Then I leaped into my list for his next visit! He seemed to go through the motions, the next few years....and then I stopped writing.

The word around was, that he retired!

 

[Joe Riley]

Next......?

 

[Shirley Martin]

 

[Mary Stetler]

​

Jessica Rose - Quit Complaining​

I loved the beginning of covid. It was like that. No one on the road or at the grocery store. I was the only one out there.

 

[Axel Slingerland]

I never answered the question...

I typically don't complain too much. It very rarely, if ever does any good. It's bad for your sanity if you worry too much.

The one thing I would complain about IF I had to pay for it is my T-Mobile phone. This the absolute worst phone I've ever had. But my daughter gave it to me because she had two unused lines on her Family Plan account. So while I was in the hospital and my son was staying in our house alone (pretty scary for a kid with Cerebral Palsy in Tweaker Town) she gave each of us a phone, and she pays the bill.

This phone is a real dumpster special. My daughter calls and even with me saying "I need to go" over and over, she keeps yammering on about nothing, and the phone works fine. But if call someone and they put me on hold, there is a 50% chance it will hang up on them for no apparent reason. It hangs up on people a lot. Other times I call someone or get called and I can hear them fine. But they can't hear me. That may have something to do with my bluetooth settings.

So I am getting a Lifeline phone. After that will come the fun part... Changing my phone number everywhere.

 

[Beth Gallagher]

I am more of a Bitch and Moan type, and I will refer you to Google if you need an explanation.

 

[Yvonne Smith]

Does that mean that you will be getting an iPhone after all, @Axel Slingerland ? Looking forward to hearing how that goes for you I once you get the phone !

 

[John Brunner]

I did a lot of vendor management in my career so have no problem raising things with business owners in a constructive manner. I know that most of them want to hear how the customer experiences stuff. If I'm trying to get something fixed by a front-line person, I know how some people can get, so I couch it with "Don't worry. You didn't ruin my life. My parents did that."

And I like the statement that you tell the person who can do something about it instead of just whining at the clerk, who likely suffers more from the problems than any customer ever could.

 

[Cody Fousnough]

Both of us have been "complainers" before, but really have been since we've really got to find out what it's like living in this Las Vegas Valley. We complained some when we lived in northern Colorado, but really nothing like we do here. The main complaints we have here is: Traffic and the way people here drive. IOW, very dangerous! The summer heat. And, for us, no real mountains/wildlife.

As for myself, I think most people complain about something, even though they don't want to admit it.

 

[April Vee]

I often complain if I see stuff I dont like,etc....

 

[Marie Miller]

I vent occasionally. My furry is a good listener.

 

[Axel Slingerland]

Please write all of your complaints on this form Before August 1st and mail it to:



Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

 

[Bill Johnson]

The difference between a complaining mode and an explaining mode

When I am bringing a product defect to someone's attention, or just answering a 'questionable' question, I tack on a caveat of sorts: "I am NOT complaining...I AM explaining!" How about YOU? Do you find yourself complaining more, as you grow older?

One confusing thing about being an octogenarian is that if I appear in person with a complaint, they are usually very helpful, but if my daughter is with me, they usually treat me as a non-person and only address my daughter as if I wasn't there.THEN the real complaining starts!

 

[Shirley Martin]

 

[Beth Gallagher]

One confusing thing about being an octogenarian is that if I appear in person with a complaint, they are usually very helpful, but if my daughter is with me, they usually treat me as a non-person and only address my daughter as if I wasn't there.THEN the real complaining starts!

Now you know what it's like to be a woman. We can do fine on our own, but if we drag husbands along with us we are suddenly invisible. When I bought my car a few months ago, the salesman kept talking to my husband who finally said, "talk to HER; she's the one buying the car." Next day when I returned I just left hubby at home.

 

[Axel Slingerland]

One confusing thing about being an octogenarian is that if I appear in person with a complaint, they are usually very helpful, but if my daughter is with me, they usually treat me as a non-person and only address my daughter as if I wasn't there.THEN the real complaining starts!

That used to really irritate my wife Cindy. Because I was the computer person and she was the car person.

Edit: Ooops. I clinked on the wrong "Reply" link. I meant to quote Beth. (Sorry, Bill.)

 

[Beth Gallagher]

That used to really irritate my wife Cindy. Because I was the computer person and she was the car person.

Edit: Ooops. I clinked on the wrong "Reply" link. I meant to quote Beth. (Sorry, Bill.)

I've always been the negotiator in our family. I study pricing and options before starting to shop, and make up my mind in advance what I'm willing to pay. I don't want new car smell to sway my judgement.

My husband is an easy sell; he just walks in and takes the first deal if it is in his comfort zone. He doesn't like to waste time at car dealerships.