Marie Mallory
Well-known member
I know Marie, I'm just being a nosey granny, who knows they will do what they want ot anyway.
Kids these Days
- Thread starter Ken Anderson
- Start date
I know Marie, I'm just being a nosey granny, who knows they will do what they want ot anyway.
Marie Miller
Well-known member
I do feel your pain. My mother has put me through it the other way around.
Axel Slingerland
Well-known member
I don't think the kids are the problem if they are a problem. I believe the parents have more to do with that then most kid's would admit. If they are taught to behave in public, a little at a time and it's not shoved down their throat, and they learn the consequences of not doing so, the kid's will act accordingly. Just like we do.
I've raised two kids, one adopted at 7, and the other was a nephew that we took in at the age of twelve, so I had to take what I had and move on from there. They both turned out pretty good.
Axel Slingerland
Well-known member
You might surprised and how much your influence contributed to who they became.
I am aware of that, but I didn't have the advantage of the earlier influences which are very important.
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Axel Slingerland
Well-known member
I didn't either. My oldest son was 14, my daughter was 12 and my youngest son, who is still with me, turned 9 the weekend I met the family. It took them awhile to warm up to me, but they were mad at their Mom catching me on the beach with a bowl of Beach Soup, and keeping me. But in time, my winning personality, and the fact that their friends started coming over for my back porch solo performances, they decided I was cool. 
But sometimes those earlier influences can make the wrong kind of impressions. The older two turned out like their Dad. Losers. I still love 'em, but they're Losers.
But sometimes those earlier influences can make the wrong kind of impressions. The older two turned out like their Dad. Losers. I still love 'em, but they're Losers.
Marie Mallory
Well-known member
I didn't either. My oldest son was 14, my daughter was 12 and my youngest son, who is still with me, turned 9 the weekend I met the family. It took them awhile to warm up to me, but they were mad at their Mom catching me on the beach with a bowl of Beach Soup, and keeping me. But in time, my winning personality, and the fact that their friends started coming over for my back porch solo performances, they decided I was cool.
But sometimes those earlier influences can make the wrong kind of impressions. The older two turned out like their Dad. Losers. I still love 'em, but they're Losers.
Axel, I didn't have time or finance's to spoil my kids, I just told them I'm not raising you to like me, I'm raising you to live in this world and respect yourself.
At times I used mama reply, " I don't give a con-ti-nen-tal damn what you want".
Marie Mallory
Well-known member
It worked pretty good, my son joined the Navy to get an education, he got Sailor of the month, then sailor of the year with a huge picture of him over the captains quarters.
Only one on the ship who could climb the mast to change light bulb.
My daughters made bad spouse choice's at first, then married good men the second time around.
Marie Mallory
Well-known member
I sent my granddaughter 2 videos below by her mother this morning my idea of a happy life is not big houses and sales, but a big life and caring.Not the firm feeling woman of course but the basics of life.
Axel Slingerland
Well-known member
That is pretty much the same thing as I told my kids, I just added that the usual "I know I am not your Father, but this is my house, and in my house, you go by my rules."
It wasn't like I was playing Drill Sergeant like my Dad did. My rules were simple, like turn lights off when you leave a room, keep the house somewhat clean, etc.
That's the way we should treat immigrants to our country.
Beth Gallagher
Well-known member
All I know about raising children can be summed up in one truth; you get back what you give. My husband and I are not the types of people who yell and threaten, and we never hit the children. We spoke to them with respect and that's exactly what we got back. We were not perfect parents but our children love us and never fail to say so.
I don't care if a child is raised in a barn or a condominium. They need to be treated with respect and kindness, some humor, and with clear-cut expectations and rules. There are just as many troubled children raised in rural areas as in urban settings, because their parents suck at it.
I don't care if a child is raised in a barn or a condominium. They need to be treated with respect and kindness, some humor, and with clear-cut expectations and rules. There are just as many troubled children raised in rural areas as in urban settings, because their parents suck at it.
Marie Mallory
Well-known member
According to if they are legal or illegal, if illegal tell them go back home and enter legally.
Marie Mallory
Well-known member
Beth `this idea is based on the hard life and labor of those who came before you and I. Who's kids worked in fields and factories and cole mines to build the kind of nation where you and yours could enjoy the kind of life to do as well as you did.
Parents didn't have time for all the explaining and coaching back then.
They went by the. "spare the rod and spoil the child" rule. And raised some very good kids.
I am glad you also raised some very good kids without corporal punishment.
My kids did well too, and they knew I would whip that ass if they didn't mind. Some of us didn't start off with resources to go to college and hire expensive baby sitters that granted us the finances to give and provide as well.
Holly Gray
Member
There are always the well raised respectful kids and then there are those that aren’t – those that are spoiled and have no values for people or their property. I think today’s youth is mostly intelligent and respectful but we always tend to notice those that are loud and disruptive.
Marie Miller
Well-known member
Ken, a lot of them get treated like secondary life forms. Had I known back then what I learned over time - life would have been easier and compensation better. If you want personal anecdotes just say so.
Beth Gallagher
Well-known member
We'll just have to agree to disagree, Marie. My parents and their parents were farmers, and no strangers to hard work. I don't remember ever getting a spanking when I was growing up. There was no "coaching" from my parents and we did not coach our children. We just tried to give them good examples and taught them common courtesy.
I certainly understand not having money for college; I had to work my way through. I can thank Sears Roebuck for my education because I put in a lot of work hours in that store to get tuition money. Nothing was ever handed to me except a decent childhood and wonderful (but poor) parents.
When I misbehaved as a child, my most dreaded punishment was having my dad give me a "talking to." Somehow I could not stand knowing that I had disappointed my father and it made me feel so bad that a spanking could not have made me feel any worse.
“When I misbehaved as a child, my most dreaded punishment was having my dad give me a "talking to." Somehow I could not stand knowing that I had disappointed my father and it made me feel so bad that a spanking could not have made me feel any worse.”
This is exactly how it was with me growing up, too !
I loved my mom and dad dearly, and could never have had any better parents. When I was too little to understand the lectures, my mom had a little “balloon stick” which she used sparingly if absolutely necessary. Plus, I am sure I got the lecture anyway, even if i was too little for it to do much good.
As I grew older, I could count on a 20 minute lecture from my mom, if needed (and probably even if not needed), but I tried hard to do everything they expected of me, because I never wanted to hurt my parents or disappoint them.
I never remember my dad spanking me, or even raising his voice to me. A disappointed look was enough to break my heart, because my sun rose and set on my Daddy.
Pretty much this is how it was when I was raising my kids, although I was not as good a parent as my mom and dad were. But any kind of spanking was rare, and usually we just discussed things, or removed privileges if necessary.
This is exactly how it was with me growing up, too !
I loved my mom and dad dearly, and could never have had any better parents. When I was too little to understand the lectures, my mom had a little “balloon stick” which she used sparingly if absolutely necessary. Plus, I am sure I got the lecture anyway, even if i was too little for it to do much good.
As I grew older, I could count on a 20 minute lecture from my mom, if needed (and probably even if not needed), but I tried hard to do everything they expected of me, because I never wanted to hurt my parents or disappoint them.
I never remember my dad spanking me, or even raising his voice to me. A disappointed look was enough to break my heart, because my sun rose and set on my Daddy.
Pretty much this is how it was when I was raising my kids, although I was not as good a parent as my mom and dad were. But any kind of spanking was rare, and usually we just discussed things, or removed privileges if necessary.
Marie Mallory
Well-known member
Beth you sure did a lot of disagreeing after you stated to agree,
I don't know why these debates turn into arguments, but i just take time off when it gets argumentive.
Now first off a Christian would have to talk to the Creator about this corporal punishment thing.
I don't think parent's whipped, spanked etc, their kids because they were evil or just liked beating on children like some seem to suspect.
Many places in the Bible where corporal punishment is not only allowed but almost ordered,
New International Version
Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish them with the rod, they will not die.
Verse (Click for Chapter) Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish them with the rod, they will not die.Don’t fail to discipline your children. The rod of punishment won’t kill them. |