Prayer Request For Chrissy

Discussion in 'Faith & Religion' started by Yvonne Smith, Jun 8, 2016.

  1. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Veteran Member
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    Thanks, Yvonne. Yes, those decisions are very hard to make and we were all very relieved that she died peacefully before we had to discuss it again. When you know that death is near no matter what, you just want the easiest, most peaceful way for it to happen.

    I was leaning towards removing the vent but didn't know how that would play out. Dying slowly was torturous in my opinion and I certainly didn't want that either.

    At the point I think all of us would have liked her shot up with morphine or whatever it took for her to die quickly.

    But that's illegal.

    Although I suspect that my husband got some extra in his last dose because it was time for the nurse to quit her shift. He died at 5:23 PM and her day ended at 6.

    She cleaned him up, instructed me to get rid of all the drugs...I didn't have pain back then and was so naive that I threw them all out....so many good drugs, lol.

    Hospice is good for that, they do make sure you don't have pain or try to anyway.
     
    #26
  2. Ina I. Wonder

    Ina I. Wonder Very Well-Known Member
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    @Chrissy Page , I think all of us have lost loved ones, or we fear for those we still have. For me it was the fear that I was going to loose the few that could love me. Maybe my mind has totally slipped off the deep end, but sometimes I'm closer to my family now, than when they were alive. I think it is because I can bring them to me mentally the moment I need them. They don't always tell me what I want to hear, but they do bring me the strength to try and live up to what is still here for me to do.
    In my mind they are no longer ill, or in pain, and they now have the understanding that awaits us all.

    image.jpeg
     
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  3. Von Jones

    Von Jones Very Well-Known Member
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    Hi @Chrissy Page. I've been missing you too and now I know why. I am sad to hear about your mother.
     
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  4. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Veteran Member
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  5. Patsy Faye

    Patsy Faye Veteran Member
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    @Chrissy Page
    Chrissy - you were fortunate to have such a good Mum - hold onto that thought too :)
     
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  6. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Veteran Member
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    Thanks Patsy, in my eyes she was perfect.
     
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  7. Krissttina Isobe

    Krissttina Isobe Very Well-Known Member
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    God please help Chrissy for her Mother has recently passed. Guardian Angles please comfort Chrissy in her time of need, thank you in the name of Christ, amen. So sorry to hear about Chrissy's Mother's passing. My Mom just came home from the emergency room too she had an infection. She has a pace maker and has already has a pace maker. When I see the commercial for heart failure meds with the song from Annie I always tear up.
     
    #32
  8. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Veteran Member
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    Thanks Krissttina, I'm sorry about how your mom is doing also. We know we will lose our parents but it's not easy.
     
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  9. Patsy Faye

    Patsy Faye Veteran Member
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    #34
  10. Diane Lane

    Diane Lane Very Well-Known Member
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    @Chrissy Page I'm so sorry, I'm just seeing this. I didn't realize you'd lost your mom, although I knew she wasn't doing well. This is always a tough time of year for me, with my Dad's birthday and then Father's Day. I also lost my closest furbaby a year ago, and I'll be glad when July rolls around. I'm sorry you're alone, especially on top of not feeling well. I'm glad you've still got family that you're close to, although not necessarily in proximity. I think those end of life decisions are some of the toughest we're ever called upon to make. I hope you're feeling better physically soon, because that will at least lighten your load. Know that we're all with you in spirit, and understand what you're going through.

    @Ken Anderson Have you tried to contact extended family and friends/acquaintances of your parents, to see if perhaps they have some pictures with your mom in them? I've always been a picture taker, and have old albums with former co-workers, friends and acquaintances, and I'd be happy to share if someone needed or wanted them. My friend's house burned down years ago, and he lost all of the pictures from when his children were young, what a loss.
     
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  11. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Veteran Member
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    Thanks Diane, yes my mom never left the hospital...I mentioned her going in January.

    June was also a tough time for me before my mom died. My husband also died in June. Seems so far I've lost 2 people I probably cared the most for in June. June 3rd was my 10 year old grandsons birthday and at least my mom didn't die then but in the early hours of June 4th.
     
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  12. Krissttina Isobe

    Krissttina Isobe Very Well-Known Member
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    :(Thanks so much.
     
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  13. Julie Stewart

    Julie Stewart Well-Known Member
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    Chrissy - I'm new here and we don't know each other yet. I feel for you in your loss and I hope you find the fortitude that you need to get through the coming days, weeks, months and on wards. Take one day at a time and be aware of your emotions so that you can express them.

    I lost my mother in December 2011, she died alone and suddenly. I had spoken to her the evening before when she seemed fine and was making plans. I had to cope with guilt that she was alone but with time my emotions settled down.

    "A fresh start" is a great way to look at this.

    I hope that you're feeling better - and eating properly!
     
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  14. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Veteran Member
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    Thanks Julie, sorry about your loss also....although I'd rather go quickly, I think that's harder for the family to deal with...it's a shock. My moms death was expected. Either way it's a loss though.

    I'm usually a little better by late afternoon and eating a little better, but then I wake up at 2:00 AM and I feel lousy again. I have so much to do and nothing is getting done.

    I need to get bloodwork done before July 1st and I'm afraid this past 2 weeks might affect it negatively for some things. Yesterday I had a few cookies for dinner and I haven't been taking my Vitamin D which was low last test.
    Haven't being drinking enough water either...keep forgetting. :(
     
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  15. Diane Lane

    Diane Lane Very Well-Known Member
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    @Chrissy Page It sounds as if you're forgetting important things such as eating, taking vitamins,and taking care of yourself in general. It might help if you made a list. That may sound silly to you, but when I'm feeling overwhelmed and as if I'm shutting down emotionally, it helps to make lists of necessary things. I also make lists of accomplishments, even the little ones, because it helps me see some progress. There've been points where I've had to make very large lists/signs really, on posterboards, so I can't forget or ignore things I have to do and things I've accomplished. I also set tasks such as opening the blinds/curtains, sitting outside for 10 minutes each day, and cross them off my list. Losing a loved one, no matter how expected, is still a huge life event. What would you tell a friend to do, if he or she were in your place? I bought a memorial plant when I lost my furbaby last year. I see it every day on my balcony. At first, I couldn't even look at it, but now I can, and it brings me comfort.
     
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  16. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Veteran Member
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    Thanks Diane, I do make lists, I've always been a list maker and no matter how miserable I am old habits die hard.

    Just not following through, I'll be okay eventually I need sleep and nothing knocks me out long enough.

    I'm a person that needed 7-8 hours, anything less and I'm miserable. Also can't nap, never could.
     
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  17. Diane Lane

    Diane Lane Very Well-Known Member
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    I understand that, I've always required at least that myself. I actually feel best if I can get 9 hours, but it's been a long time since that happened. Maybe you're unable to properly rest because you're not physically tired, so adding in some physical activity could help. I know I always sleep better on days when I've walked. Sometimes, if the weather's bad, and I have the energy, I will walk up and down the stairs to wear myself out. I can't do that right now, and have noticed that my sleep is suffering. I hope you find something that helps you feel better, and are able to get more sleep soon.
     
    #42
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  18. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Very Well-Known Member
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    I agree about the need for phyical exercise helping a person to sleep better. On the days when we go to the fitness center and i swim, I sleep so well at night. I usually sleep weell anyway, but when I have either worked in the yard, or swam and worked out at the fitness center, then my body truly feels ready for rest.
    I am totally sold on the power of swimming.
    Just being in the water is soothing to me, in itself. When I first started, I was in pretty poor physical shape, and had to rest more than I could swim; but just making the effort made a huge difference. Gradually, my muscle tone and endurance is improving, and I am doing more each time we go.
    Even a person who can't swim would benefit from just walking in water for a while. I am still not able to go out and walk like I used to do; but in the water, I can get my exercise.
    But, I totally agree, any form of exercise is beneficial to wearing out the body physically, and then you can usually sleep better. When you are already emotionally exhausted, then physical activity is harder to do; but helpful if you can do it.
     
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  19. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Veteran Member
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    Yes, that's the problem Yvonne, I'm worn out emotionally and my body is weaker. It's a vicious cycle, plus I don't want to cause any back pain which will make me reach for more pain meds or advil. I've been watching it because of my stomach.

    @Diane Lane , I actually need 9 hours too but didn't want to sound like child. :). Even though I don't drink any alcohol, if I don't get my 8-9 hrs I feel hungover the next day.

    Nothing will work until I can let go of the anger and because I've never been this angry in 65 years, I'm having trouble doing it.
     
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  20. Julie Stewart

    Julie Stewart Well-Known Member
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    I'd rather go quickly too. My mum would have been pleased ... she had actually said ( a few years earlier) "I want to go quickly, in my own home, with my own teeth and will my mental faculties intact"! - She got all of those things.

    It took me over 2 years before I felt I had an equilibrium again after mum died. Two months after she died I suffered a panic attack - I'd never had one before and haven't had one since. But it was scary and I visited my doctor who put me onto a bereavement counsellor. I had severe guilt feelings about her being alone.

    Now I have only happy memories of her and my dad who died in 1993 aged only 64.
     
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    Last edited: Jun 15, 2016
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  21. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Veteran Member
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    We all have to die, so at least it might as well be quick and easy. I think suffering not only makes it bad for the person dying but also for those left behind. Those thoughts get mixed in with other ones and nobody wants their loved one suffering.
     
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  22. Diane Lane

    Diane Lane Very Well-Known Member
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    Our bodies know what they need, and there's no judgment here, so don't worry about that. I have plenty of anger and stress, and if I'm not up to driving to the beach or trails to walk, one thing that helps me is pounding on something. These old fences are always in need of repair, so I keep a bunch of nails on hand and when I need an anger release, I go out and pound some nails into the boards that need to be shored up. I also hammered an old hard drive on the concrete out back before when I was stressed out. Alternatively, another thing that helps me is to sit and absorb the sounds and sights of nature around me, as I sit on the balcony. Sitting downstairs wouldn't be the same, but the balcony is up in the trees, so I can hear the birds, breeze, etc., better, and less of the everyday sounds the neighbors make. Once I've calmed down by listening to nature, I am able to get up and do some stretching, or if my back is particularly bad, I can do chair stretches.
     
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  23. Avigail David

    Avigail David Well-Known Member
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    Love and peace surround you, @Chrissy , wherever you are all your days. May you and your family find comfort and shelter in the hollow of God's hands and care.

    The pain of a loss of a loved one is unbearable. My Dad passed on in 2014 leaving my Mom at 77 years old. I feel helpless to be with my Mom because I and my family are oceans far apart. And I terribly miss my Dad who's been gone which seems like yesterday. I miss my Mom and sisters whom I cannot see and be with, and haven't seen since the funeral. Sigh...

    May you find some rest in your heart and comfort in your soul, dearest @Chrissy Page .
     
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  24. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Veteran Member
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    Thank You Avigail. Sorry for your loss also, yours is still fresh....takes awhile, I know from losing my husband 12 years ago.

    Like I said, hope this is the last loss I have to endure and I just hope I'm next.
     
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  25. Avigail David

    Avigail David Well-Known Member
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    So sorry and am very sad, as well about your mother @Krissttina Isobe I pray that she gets better and stronger, God giving the grace and time. I heard about Vit. C good for infections and all sorts of inflammation in the arteries. Dr. Susan Humphries on Vit C. might inspire you. Take care. And love to you, as well.
     
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