Do You Check Obituaries?

Discussion in 'People I Have Known' started by Arlene Richards, Feb 11, 2016.

  1. Arlene Richards

    Arlene Richards Very Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2015
    Messages:
    2,003
    Likes Received:
    530
    I don’t get a newspaper, so I just quickly look at the list of online obits, usually a few times a week. Once in a while I’m surprised and saddened to see someone I knew or worked with has died. (I just look at the list of names. I don't read every obituary. Sometimes I don't read any - only read if it's someone I’ve known or someone related to a person I know/knew.) Sometimes I'll send an online condolence, or maybe a card.
     
    #1
  2. Shirley Martin

    Shirley Martin Veteran Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2015
    Messages:
    11,275
    Likes Received:
    6,013
    I look to see if I see my name. If I don't, I get up and get started. :D
     
    #2
  3. Corie Henson

    Corie Henson Very Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2015
    Messages:
    2,906
    Likes Received:
    2,426
    The newspapers have only a few obituaries now unlike before when you can depend on the newspaper for news of death - the Manila Bulletin is the most widely circulated then that they hold the most number of obituaries and classified ads. But now it seems that people are into social media for those obituaries. We get a private message or see a post about someone who died. For celebrities, the obituary post would be shared so more likely I will get to read it too.
     
    #3
  4. Will Lawrence

    Will Lawrence Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2015
    Messages:
    212
    Likes Received:
    442
    I have 5 funeral homes on my "favorites" where I check obits daily. Two are from this community. The other cover towns we have previously lived in.
     
    #4
  5. Arlene Richards

    Arlene Richards Very Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2015
    Messages:
    2,003
    Likes Received:
    530
    About ten years or so ago, I ran into a former supervisor who told me a former co-worker had passed away a couple months prior. I’d heard she had health problems. But I guess some people prefer to keep their passing private, so there was no obituary or service.
     
    #5
  6. Krissttina Isobe

    Krissttina Isobe Very Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2015
    Messages:
    1,417
    Likes Received:
    1,475
    We have a newspaper subscription so my Mother checks the obits daily. It's is sad when you see someone you know in the obits. Makes you feel older than you are to see people you know in the obits! It's just something that comes with life. I recently saw Forrest Gump and the scene when his Mother was dying, "with life there is death". It hit home for my Mom has a pace maker and already had one slight heart attack. I tell my Mother that I read in the magazine that doctors hope that people live till 120 yrs. old. She just saw on the news that Zha Zha made 99 years old and Betty White celebrated her 94th. Mom is 90 this year! God bless my Mom and give her the miracle of longer life!
     
    #6
    Diane Lane likes this.
  7. Arlene Richards

    Arlene Richards Very Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2015
    Messages:
    2,003
    Likes Received:
    530
    What's even more sad is to see an obituary for the son or daughter of someone you know. The 18 year old son of an acquaintance died last year (I recognized the last name). The notice didn't say whether it was illness, accident, etc. and I recall wondering.
     
    #7
  8. Krissttina Isobe

    Krissttina Isobe Very Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2015
    Messages:
    1,417
    Likes Received:
    1,475
    We have a newspaper subscription and my Mother checks the obits daily. It is sad when you see people in the obits that you knew and it makes me feel older than I am. I recently saw Forrest Gump on television and in the scene of his mother who was dying she said, "with life there is death". It made me realize how short life is.
     
    #8
  9. Martin Alonzo

    Martin Alonzo Veteran Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Mar 7, 2015
    Messages:
    3,136
    Likes Received:
    2,924
    I look at the obits to see how many people are older than me and as time goes by the number is getting less all the time. On average there is younger people dying than my age maybe I missed my calling and will live forever or at least 120.
     
    #9
  10. Linda Binning

    Linda Binning Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2015
    Messages:
    262
    Likes Received:
    420
    I read obits to see if anyone I used to know or work with has died. I also like to read the long rambling obituaries when I buy a newspaper (I used to read one daily but not anymore) that some people publish after a loved one has died. I like hearing about people's lives even if I didn't know them.
     
    #10
    Diane Lane likes this.
  11. Diane Lane

    Diane Lane Very Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2015
    Messages:
    4,590
    Likes Received:
    4,022
    I used to enjoy reading the obits of people I didn't know, also, @Linda Binning. I think it honors their lives. There's a charge for obituaries, so perhaps that's why some don't publish them, or it could be out of a desire for privacy. We used to get the newspaper daily growing up, and we'd always read them and comment amongst ourselves if we knew the last name, and read them to see if it was someone we knew. I used to get the weekend paper, but they ended up piling up and I decided to cancel it to save a little money. I used to check my hometown obits, but so many have moved away that I don't bother anymore.
     
    #11
  12. Arlene Richards

    Arlene Richards Very Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2015
    Messages:
    2,003
    Likes Received:
    530
    I've known of instances where people requested no obituary (or even no service).
     
    #12
  13. Linda Binning

    Linda Binning Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2015
    Messages:
    262
    Likes Received:
    420
    That is true Arlene. Our family never publishes an obituary and we have no service. Only a privet memorial for close family and friends. That we have at someone's home.
     
    #13
    Lara Moss likes this.
  14. Denise Happyfeet

    Denise Happyfeet Very Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Sep 26, 2015
    Messages:
    3,216
    Likes Received:
    3,706
    Now that I can find almost anything online, I searched for an old boyfriend, just googled his name. An obituary popped up. I was so sad to learn he died at only 55 years old. I had known him when were in our forties. His sister had written the obit and it was a good read, just a sad ending. He was the highschool Valedictorian in Lompoch CA when he was a kid, went on to work for Sunset Magazine, and became very well off. He was married for a time before we met, and had one son I had met.

    What happened in his life to cause him to lose everything, I don't know. I know that he drank too much, and I remember he had some cancerous spots on his skin he had to have removed. The obit didn't say how he died. Maybe some don't, I don't know because I don't read them to answer the OPs question. For some reason though, it was a bitter-sweet thing to read my friends. I don't regret knowing about him, but like I say, bitter-sweet.

    PS the pic in the obit was also one he had given me a copy of, he was handsome, looked like Jan Michael Vincent used to look.

    PSS forgot to mention that when I met him, he was holding down a job as a warehouse worker, and was pretty unhappy. He lived in a tiny apartment, so that's why I said that he lost a lot somehow, his wife, but he did have his son on weekends etc.
     
    #14
  15. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Veteran Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Aug 11, 2015
    Messages:
    17,871
    Likes Received:
    16,704
    My husband was cremated in Fresno and there wasn't a service, but a couple months later we did have a memorial for him in his old Masonic lodge in Illinois.
     
    #15
  16. Bobby Gnomy

    Bobby Gnomy Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2015
    Messages:
    75
    Likes Received:
    99
    I don't regularly check the obituaries with the local online newspapers. But, if I'm thinking about an old friend or family member I haven't been in touch with, I will perform a search to see if they are still alive. I heard that my ex-husband from many years ago had passed away, so out of curiosity I looked online and found his obituary. My next door neighbor recently passed away in November, and I looked up his obituary. One of the memorial sites listed had hundreds of pictures uploaded by his wife.
     
    #16
    Linda Binning likes this.
  17. Karen McKenzie

    Karen McKenzie Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2016
    Messages:
    471
    Likes Received:
    1,220
    I read them sometimes. I hate seeing someone I know has died..so I don't care if I miss them.
     
    #17
  18. Hoot Crawford

    Hoot Crawford Active Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2017
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    140
    When I got a daily paper (stopped 10 years ago) I'd scan the obits every day. then for a few years I checked on line almost every day. Now, I almost never look at them. If it's someone I know I'll find out on Facebook.

    When my first wife passed away (2002) we published an obit and had a memorial service at her request. When my second wife passed away (2016) we did an obit in her old home town newspaper, but no service of any kind, again at her request.

    When I go, what happens is up to my son. He asked what I wanted, and I just said "Surprise me"....
     
    #18
    Chrissy Cross likes this.
  19. Hal Pollner

    Hal Pollner Very Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Feb 11, 2018
    Messages:
    970
    Likes Received:
    739
    I glance at it occasionally and notice that there are many who are considerably younger than me who have passed...what a waste!

    BTW...the Obituary Editor has announced he'll be vacationing for a month, so the column will be presented by the SON OF OBITuary editor.

    Hal
     
    #19
    Sheldon Scott likes this.
  20. Tim Burr

    Tim Burr Very Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Jul 20, 2016
    Messages:
    1,005
    Likes Received:
    2,062
    Since I don't do Facebook or other such things, I'll check in with the newspaper, on line,
    from the town we lived and worked at in Nebraska.

    Usually, this is the only way to find out about people I worked with or hung out with.

    Recently read of the passing of my Boy Scout mentor; the person I took over the troop from.

    An Ordained Minister who always put the boys first.

    He taught me much about how to let the boys run the Troop.

    I will miss his wisdom and caring.
     
    #20
  21. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Greeter
    Moderator Registered

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2015
    Messages:
    10,088
    Likes Received:
    13,682
    I don't regularly read obituaries but I am sometimes interested in the ages at which people die. I often find myself wishing that I were wealthier so that I could do more about my health, yet I so often find very wealthy people in the obituaries who were younger than I am at the age of death, and I'm not just talking about the ones who die of overdoses and other crazy stuff, but cancer, heart disease, and that sort of thing.
     
    #21
  22. Gloria Mitchell

    Gloria Mitchell Very Well-Known Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Mar 18, 2017
    Messages:
    2,017
    Likes Received:
    2,880
    I have no desire to read Obits...depressing, and is just another thing that ole people do....;)
    So I do not save twisty tise, pieces of foil ,have toothpicks and folded paper towels all over the house. Do not save plastic bags except for 3 off and on for trash-do not take magazine, or news papers- in fact I do not house many of the items us older people seem to want to save as we age. Told my daughter if i started doing that- shoot me:D
     
    #22
    Bobby Cole likes this.
  23. Vinny Waccio

    Vinny Waccio Active Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Jul 10, 2018
    Messages:
    73
    Likes Received:
    111
    I am terrible. First I check to see how many died that are my age or close to it. Then I check the obits of all those who wronged me. As of last year, all are now dead. I know that is terrible but they really wronged me and were not good people. It is my way of dancing on their graves.

    I once had an argument with a boss and he said that I will never have what he has, big house, boat, fancy car, etc.. unless I did things his way. I told her that he will never have what I have. He asked what. I said my youth and I bet that you would trade all those things you listed for the extra 20-30 years I will live after you die. I won. He died 25 years ago.
     
    #23

Share This Page