Living In Assisted Living

Discussion in 'Personal Diaries' started by Lon Tanner, Sep 5, 2017.

  1. John Brunner

    John Brunner Veteran Member
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    We all know life is full of tradeoffs. I've mentioned before some of the tradeoffs I made moving to a rural area and leaving the depth cultural attractions that the DC region has to offer.

    A major upside to living here is being around all the critters (and this area is rural but not remote.) Boris B. and I were discussing foxes, and just the other morning at 4AM mine were back, yapping right at my bedroom window.

    The other upside that erased any residual misgivings is I am not as COVID-bound as I would have been up north. Not only is there tons of space between us (my county has 70 people per mi² versus the 3,000 per mi² county that I left), no one here is gonna leverage the excuse to display their [aggressively ignorant] righteous indignation.

    But there are still times I can see the attraction to living as Lon is. I've often thought of getting up, having someone cook breakfast and clean up, then going out and doing as I please, coming back for lunch with the same "done for me" benefits, doing as I please, then the same for dinner...with no housework, no yard work, no home repairs, no shopping, absolutely none of life's overhead. It truly is living as royalty has...maybe better than most. There is a big freedom component to it, excepting the current environment. Of course, those are my thoughts absent any direct experience, right?
     
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  2. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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    I am in agreement with @Bobby Cole on this one, and even if we had lots of money and could live anywhere, neither of us would choose to live like @Lon Tanner lives.
    Someone else makes all of his choices for him, important choices, like having freedom to leave the facility whenever he wants to, and see his family when he wants to. Choosing not to visit family because of the lockdown rules is much different than being FORCED not to be able to see other people.
    For about a year, Lon has only seen whoever brings the food to his room, for the most part, and he has to be continuously tested for covid, whether he or anyone else there is sick or not.
    Whatever they make, is what he has to eat, and only at the prescribed mealtimes. Even though he said that he is able to fix some foods in his apartment, that is just not the same as having the freedom to choose your own food, and prepare it the way that you want to, and have as much or as little as you feel like eating of each thing.

    I am very glad that Lon is happy where he is at, and it appears that this life suits him a lot; but it is not something that I would do if I had any other options.
     
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  3. Hoot Crawford

    Hoot Crawford Very Well-Known Member
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    Different strokes for different folks. My mother and step father moved into a senior facility that is run by the Methodist church when they were about 90. Endowment was about $250k. Monthly fees vary by level of care. They started out in the independent care section, and after about 4 years moved into assisted living section, and about a year or so ago into a memory care unit. My step father passed away last fall, My mother is in the best place for her, the care is excellent, and she can never be forced out even if she can no longer pay the monthly fees. True, for about 8 months or so they were not allowed visitors, but that was a necessary precaution.

    Lon likes where he is, and I say God Bless him.

    YMMV
     
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  4. Bobby Cole

    Bobby Cole Veteran Member
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    Heck, during the times when I had to motel or hotel it whilst on a contract, other than changing towels I really do not like maid service that much. Bring me the sheets, I’ll make my own bed. Other than my wife bringing me my coffee once in a while or being waited on at a restaurant, I have no desire to be served by anyone for anything.

    It’s a given that everyone is different, thank God, but I like getting dirty. I like mowing the lawn and fixing things just as much as I like to fix my own food.
    I guess one could say that I like retirement but I do not want to be retired in the conventional sense. Yesterday I replaced a window for someone and I have a cabinet to build for another person this weekend and I have an enclosure to do for yet another person. No heavy duty commitments mind you, but if there’s something to do I generally try to do it and since I do not like people around me whilst I work, I do most of what I do by myself.

    Now, if at some point that I couldn’t enjoy being alive, able to do whatever and free ....well, that hasn’t happened yet so.....
     
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  5. John Brunner

    John Brunner Veteran Member
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    Of course, one thing that we've all overlooked is that this crap did not exist when Lon moved in. He's been there quite a while. At some point, COVID will pass. The freedom restrictions that we're all subjected to (albeit his are way more stringent) will not be around forever. This thing was not foreseeable in anybody's life. I can't see pulling up stakes to go elsewhere only to return when normalcy comes back, but perhaps that's exactly what some folks are doing.

    @Bobby Cole You hit on a few things that would influence me to not seek out such living arrangements, even in the best of times. I like to cook. I like my home projects. And I'm not big on being waited on, either. But I can see other things I might do if I were freed of the overhead. Lon's arrangements would be an all-inclusive vacation every day. That's not a bad way to spend retirement.

    But that's always the problem with choices...you make one, and you leave a ton of options behind. And none of them are perfect.

    Sans COVID, I like Lon's arrangements. I wonder how I would feel if I were actually living them (without COVID.)
     
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  6. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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    If a person does not need medical care (which Lon does), some retirees have opted to live in a hotel or even on a cruise ship. They have all of the amenities, and don’t have to be responsible for their living arrangements (home repairs, etc), and since they can dine out either at the hotel or on a cruise ship, they always have a choice of what they want to have to eat.
    One of my dearest dreams has been to be able to go on a cruise, one of those short Caribbean ones, and if it was affordable and I had to find someplace to live, I would choose the hotel or cruise ship.
    When I have gone with my daughter for her work, we always stay at a nice hotel, and I could really see myself enjoying life there, and call an Uber if I needed to go somewhere, or just wanted an excursion .
    Of course, when one needs medical care and facilities that accommodate and provide that, then an assisted living home is about the only possibility.
     
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  7. Lon Tanner

    Lon Tanner Veteran Member
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    What options do you think I have that would be better Yvonne. My health determines most of my options.
     
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  8. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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    I think that you have the best possible option for yourself, @Lon Tanner . You knew what you wanted, and you are happy there, and they meet your needs; so I do not see how you could have chosen anything better for yourself.
     
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  9. John Brunner

    John Brunner Veteran Member
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    That's an interesting thought. I wonder if a cruise ship would be spacious enough to avoid that "trapped" feeling.
     
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  10. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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    I don’t see why it wouldn’t be spacious enough, there is a lot more room than living in an apartment complex, plus the cruise ship stops almost every day, so a person could go sightseeing whenever they wanted to. You could book cruises on the off season discounts and travel around where you pleased.
    They have all of the different amenities, swimming pool (most important one for me) and lots of options for dining and entertainment. I can see why people would choose this an an alternative to living in a senior apartment.
    The nice hotels would also have a fitness area and pool, and usually bus service that a person could use if they wanted to go somewhere and sightsee.

    Senior Living at Sea website:
    https://cruiseweb.com/senior-living-at-sea/
     
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  11. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Veteran Member
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    Actually, the cabin we had on our Bahamas Cruise, was the size of our bedroom, not our entire apartment. Our cabin was that small! We had an outside cabin with a window. Could only get out of the bed from one side, because the bed was right up against the cabin wall that had the window/porthole in it. Any entertainment that we done at a port stop, we had to pay for in advance.
     
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  12. Bobby Cole

    Bobby Cole Veteran Member
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    #417
  13. Hal Pollner

    Hal Pollner Veteran Member
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    Stand offish can also be spelled "standoffish".

    Check your Funk & Wagnalls.
     
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  14. Faye Fox

    Faye Fox Very Well-Known Member
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    Brett's body language tells me he is cold. Brett did not listen to Bettyann and wear a long sleeve shirt. Notice all the others in long sleeves. It appears Carol is cross-examining him and his jaw tells me is not going to be forthcoming with the "truth." The look on Bettyann's face tells me she is disgusted with Brett not listening and then whimpering about being cold while dining. Carol is showing Brett the palm of her hand and that tells me she is dying to slap that semi-smirk off his face.

    This whole ordeal could have been avoided had Brett donned a long sleeve. Nothing wrong with Brett that a dinner jacket and sitting up straight in his chair wouldn't fix, at least for Lon's photos. :D:)

    If Brett continues to be a slouch, I suggest they bring him in a seat from an East LA lowrider. If he continues to park his buns six inches from the back of the chair, then he will have serious backaches. I fear for Bettyann's sanity should he ever suffer serious low back problems due to his horrible sitting posture.

    If I lived there I would bring my own red rose wine, a 1500 ML bottle, as a before, during, and after dinner medication. It is the only way I could deal with the high drama hahaha!
     
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    Last edited: May 3, 2021
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  15. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Senior Staff
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    To my list of reasons why I am not so sad that I can't afford assisted living, I can add that if I were interested in being in prison, I'd at least like to have the satisfaction of having committed a crime.
     
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