Wife's Job May Want This

Discussion in 'Not Sure Where it Goes' started by Cody Fousnaugh, May 10, 2016.

  1. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    My wife told me last night that she couldn't believe what her boss told her that she may have to go to India for two weeks sometime in the future. Her boss would most likely will go as well and she was told that I could also go, but we'd have to pay for me to fly.

    She told me that she would be working a phone from around 6PM until 2AM, which is daytime hours here in Florida. She has never worked those type of hours before and never wanted to. My wife talks to a Company Rep in India each week.

    Even though she was sort of stunned that her boss mentioned this business trip to her, she was sort of excited about going..........until I explained a few things to her. For one thing, I have absolutely no interest in going to India and neither of us will let her go without me. We are just wondering why on earth would a company send a 68 year old lady? The company, and obviously her boss, knows how old she is. Not only that, if either of us got sick there, what medical would we have to take care of the expense if we need to see a doctor or whatever. We are both on Medicare. The only insurance she has with this company is dental and vision. After discussing it with her, we both pretty much agreed that, if she was told to go, that she would have to decline and possibly be terminated. Don't really know about "being terminated", but it could happen.

    Well, if they did tell her, and she declined and something would happen to her job, she would seek an Employment Agency job for awhile and we'd get ready to leave Florida.

    She took a job in NC in 2008 and they sent her to Farmington, Michigan three times for training. I went with her all three times and it was fine. I found things to do in the motel while she was at work. But, that was Michigan (in an area close to where she was born/raised)........not India!

    What do you think? One thing FOR SURE, we do everything together. Well, that is when she is off of work.
     
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  2. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    India, if asked to go, or not? Heck, we don't even like the smell of their food!
     
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  3. Holly Saunders

    Holly Saunders Supreme Member
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    Hi Cody with all due respect...couldn't you just let your wife go for 2 weeks without you?..She would be with colleagues I presume and not on her own . It's only 2 weeks, and she could treat it like a working holiday...wouldn't you and she rather do that and know her job would be safe than go through all the worry of her potentially losing her job just for the sake of being separated for 2 weeks. I don't want to sound mean to you, because I know you and Mrs Cody are very close as a couple, but in this day and age where you can skype each other or facetime, every day..it would seem like a very short time to be apart for the safety, and assurance of her continuing employment...

    Oh and btw you can eat food other than curry in India too btw.. and as for her medical expenses, she need only take out insurance with her flight, and as the compnay are paying for her flight, they may well be including her insurance in the cost...it's a very low outlay for 2 weeks cover..

    I can sense you're very concerned, and I don't mean to sound offhand about this, but 2 weeks is really a very short time, and it would potentially mean that at 68 she wouldn't be put in the unenviable position of losing her job if she refuses to go.. :)
     
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    Last edited: May 10, 2016
  4. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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    While I can certainly understand how you feel about the company sending your wife to India for two weeks, I also think that @Holly Saunders has made a very good point as well, @Cody Fousnaugh .
    I remember the stress you and your wife were going through when she was out of work and trying desperately to find a job, and how happy and relieved you both were when she landed this job; so it seems to me like you would just need to look at the possible stress from either decision, as well as the benefits of both, and then decide what is best for you to do.
    Sometimes, when facing a decision like this, I use the Ben Franklin Method.
    You take a piece of paper, draw a line down the middle and write "Pro" and "Con" on the sides and then enumerate the benefits and drawbacks of going to India. Once you have done this, it is easier to see both sides of the situation and make a better decision.
    There must be a very good reason that the company chose your wife to send to India, so perhaps they think that she is outstanding in what she does, and want her to go over there and train some of the people who work on the phone as customer service reps from India.
    I think that , since you said that she was excited about going, she probably would still like very much to go; but does not want to upset you.
     
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  5. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    Well, first of all, she would rather be fired than not have me go with her. Just the way we both think/feel.
    In 15 yrs. of marriage and 1 yr. of living together/engaged, we've only been separated at night on two occasions:
    When she was in the hospital for about a week due to an operation (we were living together/engaged at that time).
    And, when I was in the hospital for 3 days/nights due to my hip replacement.
    Even during those two times, I went to see her in the hospital and she came to see me. So, it was only while we were sleeping were we away from each other.

    Sort of funny, but when the person over my wife's boss mentioned this to my wife's boss, my wife found out that her boss said "you want her to quit?" (pertaining to sending her over there. So, even my wife's boss knows that my wife really wouldn't want to go.

    Anyway, neither of us really want to have her (my wife) lose her job, but some things just can't be helped. Anyway, currently we are packing some things in our apartment, so we will (hopefully) be ready to move in case something happens.

    Another thing that is sort of funny, but happened to me as well: After she accepted this current job, she had a number of other companies call her for an interview. She declined the interviews, but that means that there were other companies interested in her. Heck, her resume makes mine look very low-keyed/lack of education. Even though they are old, she has two AA's and a Bachelor's! For me, I'm lucky I even graduated from high school (LOL).

    So, we will see what happens with this India thing, but she did have plans on leaving this company within a year or two anyway. IOW, we really, really want to leave Florida!
     
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  6. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    Wife found out yesterday that even her boss don't really want to go to India. Interesting.

    Anyway, we done some online research of India and now understand why so many Indians have come to America to live and work. Aside from that, also found out that Medicare won't cover most medical expenses while a person is in a foreign country. The weather there is HOT, especially in New Deli (113 degrees). At 2AM yesterday, it was 86 degrees. Must too hot for older folks like us! Definitely not recommended by her PCP! They are in their pre-monsoon season and have dust storms. The crime there.........don't even want to talk about that, other than to say that a lot of crime there is aimed at tourists and business folks from America. The food? Very spicy and India is known as a vegetarian country........which we are definitely NOT!

    So, we have written these things done and, if she is told she will go, she will e-mail this list of things to her boss and request not to go. But, until it is pretty confirmed that she will go, we will keep this "list of concerns" at home.
     
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  7. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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    It sounds like you should be able to get a letter from her doctor that would excuse her for the medical reaons that you listed. Definitely, that kind of heat is not good for anyone who is not used to it, and especially for us now that we are older and more susceptable to heat stroke.
    Most likely, they would Keep you in air-conditioned facilities, since it would all be provided for by the company, and I am sure that there would be places to eat that did not serve only the local Indian food.
    My daughter is sometimes sent overseas, and she usually stays in gorgeous hotels, refrigerator stocked with fresh fruit, bottle of wine, chocolates, all of that kind of thing. She loves it !
    Of course, when they sent her to Afghanistan, she had to stay in secure premises, which was much safer than if she had been in one of the hotels in Kabul. But, as long as she is not going to someplace dangerous, they always provide her with great accomadations and good food.
     
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  8. Corie Henson

    Corie Henson Veteran Member
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    This reply might be late in coming but I would still like to share. In 2011, my husband was sent to Singapore for a 1 week training. His accommodation is a 5-star hotel in the upscale area of Clark Quay. It was a rush trip that was finalized just 3 days before the flight. But we have an alternative for me to go with him, buy my own plane ticket. And when we checked the airlines, it was quite expensive so I let it pass.

    When I would be assigned in the province during my younger years in the office, my husband would always accompany me. Our first trip was to Baguio City, a cool place that is fit for tourists. My husband would roam around while I work during the daytime. It was just 3 days assignment. And since we had no budget, my husband would have bread and butter literally for his lunch inside the hotel room. Despite the lack of money, we still enjoyed the trip since we had free accommodation and I also was provided with food allowance. In my next trips, things got better and my husband enjoyed escorting me to the provinces.
     
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  9. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    Thought that I'd already replied to my Thread about what happened concerning this trip, but I hadn't.

    Apparently, her boss talking to her about this trip was only a "testing of the waters" to see how she felt about it. IOW, it wasn't "set in stone" yet. Anyway, a couple of weeks ago, she talked to her boss and told her that she simply didn't want to go. Her boss said "ok, no problem". She also ask her boss if her decision would affect her job and her boss said "nope". We were both extremely happy that they are not going to send her now.
     
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  10. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    Well, ends up my wife's boss and the CFO went to India. My wife found out that her boss was going a couple of months ago. Originally, her boss was going to have her daughter and husband go , but because school is back in, her husband and daughter stayed behind. Her boss and the CFO will be there for 2 weeks. My wife talked to her boss on the phone yesterday. The weather there is very hot and her boss told her "people are constantly knocking into you and each other. I can't wait until this two weeks are over and I can come home". They also have to work an 8PM to 5AM type shift because of the time difference between India and the U.S.

    Sure glad my wife didn't have to go!
     
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  11. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Supreme Member
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    I love to travel but the time difference would have been tough on me. It always took me a week to adjust just going to Europe. Also don't like very hot since that's what I live with...other than that I'd enjoy the sights and food if I had the time.
    I would be afraid of the water though. My husband was there on business and always ate only in the best hotels etc but he got very sick...he had a colostomy already an they had to call the hotel dr.

    Also, major cleanup as you can imagine...
     
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  12. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    We've had two Indian neighbors that cooked that Curry stuff and we could smell it..........YUK (to us). The sights could be interesting, but the food, forget it! Actually, we could definitely think of better places/countries to visit.......like England, Paris and Venice.
     
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  13. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Supreme Member
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    I like curry but it stays around for awhile that's for sure. I've already seen a lot of Europe so it's diffrent for me...
    You'll see a lot of curry dishes in England too, @Cody Fousnaugh. It's very popular there and if I'm wrong @Holly Saunders will correct me or even @Patsy Faye.

    My husband didn't like India one bit and said the only way to get rid of the poverty and people living and doing their business (bathroom) in the street was to bomb it...,I'm sure he was joking (kind of) but my hubby was kind of like Trump...except not as wealthy but spoke his mind.

    So maybe that's why I don't see Trump as a racist, homophobe whatever because my husband wasn't ...he had no hate for Mexicans, blacks, Muslims, gays. He treated them equally unless they did something that was wrong. He grew up in an environment that was "macho" and that's how he talked but was really a very kind and generous man.
     
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    Last edited: Oct 11, 2016
  14. Patsy Faye

    Patsy Faye Supreme Member
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    Curry 'is' very popular here which astounds me, a bit different to fish an chips
    Not for me - don't like anything hot (as you know)
     
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  15. Chrissy Cross

    Chrissy Cross Supreme Member
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    I like spicy things and diffrent things as long as it doesn't have coconut milk in it.
     
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