If you're like most people, common everyday items look inert to you. But what you may not know is that many of them have a gender. For example . . . Ziploc Bags = Male, because they hold everything in but you can see right through them Copier = Female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm up. It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed Tire = Male, because it goes bald and often it's over inflated Hot Air Balloon = Male, because to get it to go anywhere you have to light a fire under it . . . and, of course, there's the hot air part Sponges = Female, because they're soft and squeezable and retain water Web Page = Female, because it's always getting hit on Subway = Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up Hourglass = Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom Hammer = Male, because it hasn't evolved much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around Remote Control = Female . .. Ha! You thought it'd be male. But consider -- it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying.