How Friendly Are You?

Discussion in 'Philosophy & Psychology' started by Cody Fousnaugh, Jun 14, 2019.

  1. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Veteran Member
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    Do you know your neighbors and talk to them?

    Only people we know are some of the residents that live in the building we do. May sound strange, but since we've told the people that we know in our building where we are moving to, they haven't been that friendly with us. Wife and I are friendly people, but it gets old waving at someone that drives past us here and people not waving back.

    We can be friendly towards someone we meet at restaurant, but here, people are truly shocked that we will even talk to them. Strange, but I think the amount of crime here has a lot to do with being "friendly" here.

    Actually, it can be very hard being friendly (in person) to folks that have absolutely nothing in common with you.

    I think this "friendliness" is what I really miss about "small town living".
     
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  2. Holly Saunders

    Holly Saunders Veteran Member
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    I'm a very chatty person. I was born and raised in the North of the UK where everyone chats to everyone.. standing in a queue, sitting in a waiting room at the doctor surgery, walking down the road.. standing at a bus stop.. everywhere...

    I moved to the South 45 years ago... and I STILL haven't got used to the idea that if I start a random convo with someone in a queue, they look at me like I have horns growing out of my head, like I've landed, foaming at the mouth , with ''I'm from Mars'' stamped across my forehead!!!''

    I'd love to move back North, but we can't due to my husbands' job now that I've retired .. and also the weather here is so much better than the north..(personally I wouldn't mind at all about the weather )..but hubs whose a southerner absolutely refuses to go where it's cold and wet most of the year!!

    Yes I do know my neighbours... their names their children's names ( adult children now).. but other than a passing...''how are you''..there's little convo.. except for my next door neighbour who I've know for 40 years
     
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  3. Beth Gallagher

    Beth Gallagher Very Well-Known Member
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    We know most of our neighbors and everyone seems friendly enough. Most of us keep to ourselves but we speak and wave.
     
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  4. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Greeter
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    I don't think I'm unfriendly but I've never been particularly sociable. I know my neighbors and plenty of other people in town, but I'll usually sit at my own table at a restaurant. I don't mind if someone I know joins me but I generally don't take the initiative.
     
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  5. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Veteran Member
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    I can be a real "Chatty Kathy" at times. I was very friendly at my last job and my co-worker thought it was pretty cool. My wife is exactly the opposite where she works now. When we lived in Colorado before, she was friendly with different co-workers, but still not as much as I am.

    We both can be friendly, but making friends is a different story. We like people who like what we like. Reasonable or not, it's just the way we are. AND, we choose not to make friends with smokers or people who swear.
     
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  6. Don Alaska

    Don Alaska Very Well-Known Member
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    We know our closest neighbors, but one is a sex offender (molested his daughter for years) so we don't talk to him unless absolutely necessary. Our other neighbor has a little church that we attended sometimes when our children were small and played together, but now only socialize if I happen to see the men out working on something. My wife and the pastor's wife are friends but not close. My wife has many friends, but I generally can't be bothered. Maintaining friendships is like marriage--it takes a lot of work.
     
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  7. Lon Tanner

    Lon Tanner Veteran Member
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    I am friendly and find that engaging people with a smile prior to words always helps.
     
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  8. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Greeter
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    When I was working for Champion, I was involved in the UPIU, and that involved having some kind of a relationship with people who I wouldn't otherwise hang out with and, later, when I was working in EMS, as the director of a volunteer service, then as a co-owner of a private ambulance company, I had to be out and about the community in order to get support for things such as contributions, contracts, and so on. I joined the Lions Club, which bored me to no end, and I volunteered for community events that I had no real interest in. It wasn't all bad; in fact, sometimes it was even fun, but it wasn't me. I'd rather know two people really well than have good relationships with fifty.

    I'm not particularly extroverted but I am not shy, either. I have been on the radio and on television, promoting EMS services that I have been involved in, and as the program chairman for the EMT department at TSTC. I've served in various positions in the church, including youth pastor and interim pastor, and when we were involved politically here in Millinocket, I was usually the one who spoke to the media. But I don't go out looking for relationships for the sake of having a relationship. That's probably why I didn't marry until I was forty-eight.
     
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  9. Bess Barber

    Bess Barber Very Well-Known Member
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    If being sociable was a 10, I'm super duper sociable till 4.5, then it drops off totally. Even my closest friends and family know never to visit me without it being planned. I don't do drop by or extended stays. LOL.
     
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  10. Gloria Mitchell

    Gloria Mitchell Veteran Member
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    I am a people observer most of the time. I am very approachable and friendly but do not go out of my way. My filter can be come clogged and must watch myself as others do not always share my dry sense of humor.
    @Cody Fousnaugh ...honey child you and I would never be freinds...I probably would not waste time talking to you. I would be nice and polite but never invite you for dinner.See..... that spark of anger...
    you could not handle my honesty without a problem. But on this forum we be just fine.
    See I can be friendly:D
     
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  11. Bobby Cole

    Bobby Cole Veteran Member
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    Yeah, I can be a tad sociable but I have some trust issues which keep me from getting even remotely close to anyone with the exception of Yvonne.
    I even detest phone calls and people knocking on the door. Thus far in my life I have never had anyone call me without asking for something and as far as people coming to the door, everyone with the exception of one or two people seem to have an agenda other than just saying howdy.
    Actually, even if there were someone who just wanted to say howdy, I would probably limit the amount of time for them to say it to a couple of minutes.

    As it stands, I sit on my front porch every morning whilst having coffee, listen to the news, write, study or play a small head game and watch the street and the antics that are displayed on that front. Everyone knows me and I am familiar with what everyone does and who they are but that’s about as close as I’m gonna get unless of course when I have to tell someone to pick their derned litter off my lawn where they threw it.

    Bottom line is that I am much better at saying goodbye than hi.
     
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  12. Peter Renfro

    Peter Renfro Well-Known Member
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    The section of town road we live on is a mile long. There are nine homes. We all wave and speak when we see each other. We have a Fourth of July party where we will all kick in for illegal fireworks and have a hell of a cook out.
    There is one guy that lives in the bottle that is not real friendly, but his long suffering wife is a sweetheart.
    When I go to the small grocery in town it takes a lot longer to do the shopping than it should cause it seems everyone wants to say hi.
    When we go to the "big" town,"8000 souls" to do big shopping, I don't talk to too many people at all, except to nod and say "howyadoin"
     
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  13. Mary Robi

    Mary Robi Very Well-Known Member
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    We spend the summers up here in the Blue Ridge and you won't find friendlier, more welcoming people anywhere in the world. I find myself chatting in line everywhere I go. People will stop and chat at the drop of a hat. I love it!
     
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  14. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Veteran Member
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    I'll be friendly in Colorado, BUT try extremely hard not to talk about living in Jacksonville or Florida. We found out, from our visit there last July 2018, people care less about the South or Florida.

    One thing for sure, and I did a thread about this...…..wife and I are NOT "open-minded" folks, so when I run into someone who is "open minded" a "debate" discussion can happen over what they think is "ok" or "doesn't bother me" and my feelings.
     
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  15. Bobby Cole

    Bobby Cole Veteran Member
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    Did you know that @Bess Barber lives in Jacksonville? Thus far she seems to be a delightful person and who knows, she might even be a neighbor of yours.
     
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