Unfriendly People

Do you have unfriendly people where you live or are the people friendly?

This is what I like about a small town.........friendly people, that is, as long as newcomers don't try changing a town to what they want. Then, the "friendliness" can (possibly) go straight down the drain.

I'm a pretty friendly guy, as most of you can tell by this forum. But, I do (pretty much) know who to be friendly with and who not to be. Now, if I come across somebody and talk to them for the first time, but later they see me and don't say squat, I don't push the "friendly" thing. I just go on my "merry old way".

So, how do you feel about "unfriendly" people, especially when you have a "friendly" type of personality?

 

I haven't come across too many unfriendly people in real life. But if someone wouldn't respond to me I would just let it go...people are different ...why push them to be friendly?

When I'm out and about, I talk to everyone...sometimes I initiate it sometimes they do.

Since I'm never that much in a hurry I'm also courteous...I let people with less items in their carts go ahead of me etc.

At the drs office I talk to the receptionist, nurse etc...they all talk to me and know me pretty well.

Even when I was getting my prescriptions at Target...the pharmacist would notice if I got my hair cut..those type of things.

Ive had neighbors I didn't even know help me out when I had my AC go out last summer. Nice guy tried to fix it for me but it was dead.

He did change my air filter and also lent me a portable AC unit to help me through the hot days before the AC company came out. All for free!

I think if you're friendly people will respond positively!

 

Ok. Now, say they respond the first time, but then you find out that YOU always have to start the conversation? That's something I don't like. I can say "good morning" first as well as they say it first.

Wife and I found out pretty quickly that there are a lot of people here that truly get shocked when we first start talking to them. Guess there is so much crime, most people don't trust people here. Actually, I make a joke of it and have told my wife, "perhaps I should start the conversation with...........I haven't got a gun nor am I going to rob you."

 

There's a couple of 'moody' people here (where I live) and it irritates me
No matter how I'm feeling - I can manage a smile and 'hello'

 

One time, in a Home Depot parking lot, I seen that this truck had a brake light out. The driver and his wife were still in the truck. I walked up to the driver's side window, he rolled it down and before I had a chance to say a word, he looked at me and said "I don't have any change". I immediately said "I was only going to tell you that your left side brake light is out." He smiled and said "thanks".

Now, in a small town, where most people know each other, I would call the driver by name and tell him about the light. That is what "nice friendly small towns" are like.

 

Well I live in a fairly large city and most are very friendly. Can't think of having any problems regarding unfriendly people.

I was just at food for less where you bag your own groceries ...I bought a case of water and since my shoulder issue I asked for help getting it in the cart...guy helped me and asked if I needed help getting it in the car..I said yes but I'm still shopping so when I got to checkout told the cashier and she got another person to put it in my trunk.

I offered her a dollar but she wouldn't take it. This is a store where it's not usual for them to ask if you need help taking it to the car.. because its a no frills store.

My neighborhood goes the extra mile with being helpful. A few weeks ago a neighbor's dogs made a hole in his fence and 3 dogs got out.

It was on the neighborhood app and people were already trying to round up the dogs and when they did someone temporarily patched the hole til the owner got home.

They didn't know that person either...were just out walking...

 

I don't worry about who says "hi" first. My neighbor across the street is almost deaf...sometimes she doesn't hear me when I shout hi across the street...it's not because she's unfriendly.

 

We have neighbors that are very nice and we talk to, but there are people in the complex that are truely unfriendly. I think they moved here from New York City or Los Angeles ( being kind of sarcastic).

 

@Chrissy Cross Thank You for bringing this point up.

At work, I have to wear an ear piece hooked to the control radio
and I can't wear my other hearing aid in the other ear because of feedback.

So, I am pretty deaf in both ears, I sometimes don't hear someone talking to me
unless I can see their lips move.

I'm sure some people will think I'm not a nice person because I didn't respond to
their greeting.

Those who know of my hearing loss will raise a hand in a greeting to get my attention.

I like this.

Also, even with my hearing aids in and set, people will talk to me as they are leaving
the space or room we are in. I'll lose the conversation thread when this happens.

Of course, if I don't like you, I might just turn my aids off and just smile and nod
at certain moments.

 

Unfortunately this post popped up before I had time to reply to the original post. I'm aware that we NYers have a reputation for being unfriendly, and even rude- but it's an undeserved reputation, and possibly based on misunderstandings.
In contrast, current location presents the facade of being 'friendly,' when what they really are is 'intrusive.' I mean they don't grasp the concept of 'boundaries.'

 

Some examples of what I'm talking about:

A 14-yr-old girl was walking home from school when she happened to meet up with a guy around 30 yrs old. Age difference and fact that they didn't know each other shouldn't be relevant, because wrong is wrong: the guy started getting grabby with her, and later explained to the police that he was 'just being friendly, just wanted to give her a hug.'

One of my experiences: a guy followed me home to find out where I lived- didn't know the guy, except on sight; he proceeded to knock on the door and said 'I thought I'd come over and hang out.'
Another: was in a small restaurant having lunch with an acquaintance; individuals at another table (strangers) proceeded to invite themselves into our conversation.

So would you call these examples 'being friendly,' or 'way out of line'?

Something occurred to me: would these 'boundaries' issues these days be based on lack of socialization and lack of social skills? Like they don't know how to interact appropriately with other people, so they just get downright intrusive.

 

That is way out of line @Janice Martin ....I draw the line at intrusive.

 

I am talking about being friendly, NOT pushy.

 

That's me too...exactly like that!!!...people are always teasing me about ignoring them , but I just don't notice them, too busy going about my business..