What Were Your Family's Greatest Strengths?

Discussion in 'Family & Relationships' started by Ken Anderson, Feb 7, 2018.

  1. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Senior Staff
    Staff Member Senior Staff Greeter Task Force Registered

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2015
    Messages:
    24,330
    Likes Received:
    42,633
    This topic can be viewed as asking two different questions, and the answers to either of both would be appropriate here.

    I could be asking about the family that you were born into, which is what I had in mind when I decided to approach the topic. But many of us have made families of our own and, quite likely, we would view the family that we created from a different perspective from that in which we were born into.

    Some of us are probably very thankful for the life that our parents have given us, and for the family in which we spent our childhood, and that might include our parents, siblings, grandparents, uncles, aunts, cousins, and others were part of our early life.

    Probably even if we have reason to believe that we grew up in a dysfunctional family, there were still strengths or things that helped to prepare us to become the people we became.

    What were your family's greatest strengths?
     
    #1
    Holly Saunders likes this.
  2. Jackie Stewart

    Jackie Stewart Veteran Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2015
    Messages:
    126
    Likes Received:
    114
    Simply put, just being there for each other.
     
    #2
    Ken Anderson likes this.
  3. Patsy Faye

    Patsy Faye Supreme Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2015
    Messages:
    13,568
    Likes Received:
    16,301
    Neither Mum nor Dad were 'down' people although Dad had those times like me, he could get out of it
    Mum was a hard worker she loved to work and that made me very aware of doing a good job.
    Mum was not maternal at all, which made me a very caring person
    Dad loved music and transferred that love to me.
    Neither could cope with each other, my Mother was a free spirit - should never have married.
    My grandmother was a remarkable woman and influenced my thinking
    Found meself a caring family and asked Mum to let me live with them, I did for a couple of wonderful years.
     
    #3
  4. Holly Saunders

    Holly Saunders Supreme Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2015
    Messages:
    51,949
    Likes Received:
    17,919
    I was born into a very dysfunctional family.....

    If I was to choose only one thing it would be despite everything bad about him...my father was a hard worker.. he despised anyone who was healthy who didn't work hard, so that instilled a great work ethic into me.. ( mostly out of sheer terror as to what would happen if I didn't work)

    As for my mother she taught me to be afraid of taking medication... ( perhaps that's not a strength)... but she also suffered from Münchhausen's by proxy and we as children were forever being taken to doctors and hospitals, for the smallest of reasons.. . ( not her fault but that's another story)


    So as it was a dysfunctional family there was no real strengths.... . I lived with several foster families and also in a children's home over the years of my childhood.. and also with my grandmother for 2 years as a very small child...

    Can't thing what the strengths were of any of those...although I loved my mum and my granny...

    Good question @Ken Anderson
     
    #4
  5. Babs Hunt

    Babs Hunt Supreme Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2016
    Messages:
    8,565
    Likes Received:
    12,083
    My Family's greatest strengths are our:

    1. Mutual faith and spirituality.

    2. Our love and affection for each other.

    3. Our commitment and loyalty to each other.

    4. Our consistent communication with one another and making time to gather
    together for fun times and holidays, etc.

    5. Our willingness to do whatever it takes to be there when we need each other's help or support in whatever way we need it.
     
    #5
    Bobby Cole and Don Alaska like this.
  6. Holly Saunders

    Holly Saunders Supreme Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2015
    Messages:
    51,949
    Likes Received:
    17,919
    Bumping this thread because it's an interesting topic...
     
    #6
  7. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2015
    Messages:
    12,753
    Likes Received:
    8,743
    Actually lived with three different families/parents, until I graduated from high school and went in the Navy.

    Well, I had all three families written out and then decided to delete the history and simply put this:

    Only the third family (Guardians), distant older cousins (that I was told) showed me any kind of love. Unfortunately, they had never had kids and took me in when I was 14. To me, and other kids I knew, they were overly strict. Step-dad loved math and was pretty muscular. Tried to get me to be the same way, but it didn't work. Step-mom had me helping her do dishes at night and a few other "household" type jobs. A close friend/neighbor took me to each Class Dance. He was a good friend, but upper-classman. Only had one date in high school, to my Senior After-Prom Party. Done a lot of work on the small farm we lived on. I am totally grateful for then taking me in.

    Through the years, I've been able to show, like to my wife, that I can do household work as well as some harder work outside. Have to thank the step-parents for that.

    Being married to my wife has shown me what REAL love is, that I had really never known before. So, all-in-all, I didn't turn out so bad. LOL
     
    #7
  8. Holly Saunders

    Holly Saunders Supreme Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2015
    Messages:
    51,949
    Likes Received:
    17,919
    Sounds like you had a pretty similar life to me Cody...
     
    #8
  9. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2015
    Messages:
    12,753
    Likes Received:
    8,743
    Well, I was kept of Foster Homes, which is a good thing. Actually, Holly, I thought my step-parents were strict, until I went in the Navy. The Navy showed me what "strict" really was. WOW!
     
    #9
    Holly Saunders likes this.
  10. Holly Saunders

    Holly Saunders Supreme Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2015
    Messages:
    51,949
    Likes Received:
    17,919
    Yep well my first husband was in the Navy, while we were married.. so I know all about that. he came from a happy home where he was worshipped by his parents and family...so it was a bit of a shock for him when he joined up, but he eventually came to love it.. and tbh Cody he went in a 'boy'' aged 19 and came out a "Man''...
     
    #10
  11. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2015
    Messages:
    12,753
    Likes Received:
    8,743
    Well, I didn't necessarily come out a "Man", but I was able to do fun things that I couldn't when I lived with the step-parents. Made my first cruise, out of San Diego, California, to Vietnam in Dec. 1968. Even have my graduation picture from NTC Great Lakes.
     
    #11
  12. Holly Saunders

    Holly Saunders Supreme Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2015
    Messages:
    51,949
    Likes Received:
    17,919
    Oh I never got to do anything with my parents ...nor foster parents. if it wasn't for my grandmother who used to take me to the theatre occasionally or the seaside when I was small , I would have learned nothing about the arts or anything geographical, but my grandmother had no access to us kids when we were fostered out..she wasn't permitted to know where were..

    My oster parents were kind bu strict too...they have to be I suppose.. but ultimately when you grow up in conditions like that shunted from one forster home to another.. then back to parents for a year or 2 then away again, and no-one explains why...you grow up with very little self esteem
     
    #12
  13. Tex Dennis

    Tex Dennis Veteran Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2018
    Messages:
    911
    Likes Received:
    1,554
    My family well my uncle let me do so much more than mother and dad did, we hunted, fished & rode horses everywhere anytime we could. Mother and dad were strict but dad and I hunted and fished all the time, being inside was punishment to me as it still is now. I rarely ever got in any trouble as I would have to stay inside so that was a huge deterrent to do right, when most friends were on bicycles I was off on my horse in the woods somewhere, I did learn at an early age girls love to ride horses! I always usually had more wanting to ride than could go unless they had a horse. My parents said it kept me out of trouble! My uncle just laughed.

    My parents and I got along great.
     
    #13
  14. Tim Burr

    Tim Burr Veteran Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Jul 20, 2016
    Messages:
    1,260
    Likes Received:
    2,619
    My family's strength was adapting.

    Not sure about my brothers, but I attended 4 elementry schools, 2 Jr. Highs and 3 High Schools.
    All of these in different states or countries.

    When you move from the Southern US to Scotland, you adapt.
    Move from Scotland to Hawaii, you adapt.

    We moved alot as a family and learned to rely on each other.
    You moved and lost friends, so family was your anchor.

    No matter where we wound up, my Mom's Southern cooking stayed the same!!! :D
     
    #14
  15. Holly Saunders

    Holly Saunders Supreme Member
    Registered

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2015
    Messages:
    51,949
    Likes Received:
    17,919
    WoW Scotland to Hawaii...what a huge Culture shock @Tim Burr ...what most Scots wouldn't do to move there, but I understand what you mean, it must have been difficult for a while each time you moved...

    As a child growing up in Scotland, we moved house so many times I can barely count, and each time it was a new school.. sometimes to a different part of Scotland inot foster parents and a new family and new school.. so I stood out not only because my accent was different but I was always the newbie, and never made life long friends.. sadly our family was never an anchor..
     
    #15
    Bill Boggs and Ken Anderson like this.

Share This Page